Well folks it’s that time of year again! The middle of the season has arrived and teams are already showing signs of contender status, pretender status, or roadkill status. Although there’s still a lot of games remaining, teams should be playing their best football at this point.

Time to separate the MEN from the BOYS!

PRIMETIME : Two-time champs, division leader, vying to complete a dynasty

• Scoring 23.5 points per game

• Holding opponents to just 11 points per game

• All-Stars Jason Scott (20 Passing TDs), Kenny Ashmore (41 Receiving TDs), and Kory Vorum (Five Sacks) are all at the top of their statistical categories

• Has beaten good teams like BILLY GOATZ, MMG, and DECEPTICONS.

• Could potentially be upset by the MYSTERY MEN in the last game of the season. Despite their record, the MEN have a lot of talent, including ex-PRIMETIME receiver and All-Star Scott Kaercher

• Barring injury this team will be on pace to wrap up the number one seed for the playoffs.

GRADE: A

MYSTERY MEN: Talented team, second place in their division, playing below the level of talent on their roster

• All-Stars Bob Lee and Kaercher are having down years for the MEN. Consequently, their offensive production is suffering.

• Despite beating the SAVAGES 28-14 in Week 3, turnovers and incompletions gave the free agent team confidence that they could play with the mYSTERY MEN.

• Has not looked good against talented teams like BILLY GOATZ, PUCK U, and MMG.

• With games remaining against PRIMETIME and VAPOR, the MEN are in danger of finishing the season with a losing record.

GRADE: D

MULTIPLE SCORGASMS: Poor QB play, undermanned roster for first few games, disorganized

• MS has been shutout in five of their six losses this season.

• The defense is giving up an embarrassing 26 points per game.

• Averaging just 4.5 points per game on offense.

• Their only win has come against the 0-6 WALKING WOUNDED.

GRADE: F

SAVAGES (0-4): Inconsistent attendance for games by players on their roster, zero chemistry, not enough practices

• The team usually has three players show up each week.

• Cameron “Brolic” Dixon is the only original SAVAGE player that has shown up every week.

• Free Agent Will Mills has brought some leadership and stability to the team.

• Below average quarterback play.

• Overall, this team is going nowhere in the playoffs and that’s a shame because Dixon is too good of a player to be struggling the way he is on the SAVAGES.

GRADE: D

SILVERBACKS: Lacking playmakers on offense, inexperienced, doesn’t know how to win yet

• When your leading WR has just 18 receptions and three TDs in six games, your team is doomed for roadkill status.

• The SILVERBACKS are not getting consistent play at the QB spot.

• The lone bright spot for this team is that Defensive Back Steve Polite is pretty good. I watched him have success against MMG All-Star Trey “Fresh Prince” Johnson

• This team is not equipped to make it past the first round of the playoffs.

GRADE: D-
 

SPARTANS: No quarterback, rusty players, inconsistent player attendance week-to-week

• This team is full of rusty 30-something players that are on the verge of becoming “over-the -hill.”

• None of the SPARTANS have the demonstrated the ability to play the quarterback position at a competent level.

• The absences of Shawn Ellis and Royce Woods have hindered the SPARTANS’ ability to combat fatigue by substituting players.

GRADE: F

WALKING WOUNDED: This team still looks like the LONGHORNS...and that’s not a good thing!

• Veteran QB Harold Russell still has not figured out how to lead his players into the end zone consistently.

• His primary target Noah Snyder is reliable but Russell locks in on him at times and his other targets.

• Former All-Star Mark Hernandez has been a disappointment so far this season.

GRADE: F

DARKWINGS: Division leaders, seasoned veterans, on the cusp of becoming a contender

• The DARKWINGS are beating the teams that they are supposed to beat. SQUAWWWD, WALKING WOUNDED, and MULTIPLE SCORGASMS are all roadkill status through the midway point of this season.

• Unfortunately, the WINGS scored just six points against a good SMOKE team.

• While they are winning the majority of their games I think that run the risk of losing the IRON West

GRADE: B-

VENOM: This team has potential but they still need to develop better chemistry on both sides of the ball.

• VENOM’’s defense is allowing 25 points per game.

• Meanwhile, their offense is scoring just 17.3 points per game.

• Despite having a full roster each week, the players don’t seem to up to the task of beating up on teams that only have four or five guys.

• This team will go as far as All-Star Shawn McCallum takes them.

GRADE: C

MMG: Still athletic but this squad is underachieving against better teams.

• Although All-Star QB Tony Battaglini has thrown 11 TDs so far, his eight interceptions are killing MMG.

• The once vaunted defense has now deteriorated to the tune of giving up 25.5 points per game.

• The 25-0 loss to the VULTUREZ is a bad omen for a team that is usually regarded as a playoff contender.

GRADE: D-